I think they're both adorable. Yet a decade and a half later, I'm still pondering this issue. A total of couples of Western men and Asian women versus only six couples of Asian men and Western women including him and his Brazilian wife. All the American girls I knew liked flirting with the local Spaniards, and why not? When I think about how a racist caricature from Hollywood gets tossed around among expats as a symbol of Chinese men -- and Westerners from around the world harbor consistently negative views of Chinese men -- I realize there's a dark side to this whole discussion.
- Why Won't Western Women Date Chinese Men HuffPost
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When I think about how a racist caricature from Hollywood gets tossed around among expats as a symbol of Chinese men -- and Westerners from around the world harbor consistently negative views of Chinese men -- I realize there's a dark side to this whole discussion. When I came down with the flu, he accompanied me to my therapy at the clinic and read to me from Chicken Soup for the Soul.
But what about the conversations about expats themselves and their own homegrown stereotypes and prejudices about Asians and Chinese people? While respondents praised Chinese men for certain qualities -- "looking after one's family," "willing to spend money on women," and "relatively serious about relationships between men and women" -- the admiration ended there.
He always opened doors for me and wouldn't leave my side until he escorted me all the way to the entrance to my apartment. These are very critical discussions that we need and should continue to have.
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That's true anywhere in the world, including China.
It's also 15 years since I first learned that most Western women in China refuse to date Chinese men.
We could try new things. At least that woman wasn't as blunt as another colleague, who used to bicycle with me through the streets of Zhengzhou.
And I can't help but wonder how many decades it will take before it's no longer an issue for expats in China. Why are couples of Western women and Chinese men -- such as me and my husband -- so rare?
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And sometimes, their dislike was just shocking. Zhang's findings -- that Western women from around the world have consistently pejorative ideas about Chinese men -- remind me this isn't a problem confined to some insular expat circles in China.
In the still, he's locked in an awkward slow-dance embrace with a girl an entire head taller than him, but that's not even the worst of it.
Back inI discovered a post on a now-defunct blog authored by expats in Shanghai. He always opened doors for me and wouldn't leave my side until he escorted me all the way to the entrance to my apartment. Yet when I think about the global reach of this problem, and the fact that it's even tough for Western-born Chinese to score a date outside of their own race, I know deep down that cultural differences -- as much as they matter in relationships -- cannot alone account for why few Western women date Chinese men.
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feature; if a local match, religious beliefs, or community are particularly If you're one of those big City girls or an outdoorsy guy, be upfront about what.
Back inI discovered a post on a now-defunct blog authored by expats in Shanghai. I didn't know much about China back then -- a time when I could only communicate in Mandarin with a dictionary and lots of patience, and where my entire cultural knowledge was amassed from the library books on China I borrowed during the summer.
When I thought about my burgeoning crush for Tian, I figured it was no different from that college semester when I studied in Spain.
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In September -- my first month in China -- I had a huge crush on a guy. As I continued to date the locals in China and eventually married a fellow from Hangzhou, I would come to realize that most expat women in China agreed with my Zhengzhou colleagues.
I think they're both adorable. Whenever expats discuss racism in China, we usually focus on Chinese people and their racist attitudes such as the experience of being black in China.
Why Won't Western Women Date Chinese Men HuffPost
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My heart melted at that first sight of his big sesame-oil brown eyes. There's the fun-loving fellow from Xi'an who described himself as a "foreign student turned party boy," the beefcake husband from Hebei she considered "China's answer to Arnold Schwarzenegger," the Shanghai-based writer from Anhui who studied English literature and mused about his unforgettable romances with black women in the US.
It's a troubling problem, one that even gets me and my husband down. My husband posing with our nephew.
At the time I was only beginning to learn about negative stereotypes of Asian men that American TV, movies and the media had perpetuated over the years: